growth.

There's nothing quite like witnessing yourself grow. I don't mean the ways in which your shirt begins to tighten around your chest, signaling the need for a new undergarment, or how your parents used to buy you clothes and sneakers every few months or so because your body would quickly shoot out in all directions, past the cotton fabric and beyond the rubber soles faster than your parents could afford. I'm referring to how you no longer shuffle your stride, you are now quick enough to keep pace with the midtown crowds. How you no longer look down at the pavement, which you did so often your grandfather used to ask if you found any pennies down there. Now you walk with purpose. No longer the girl with the low participation grade in class, your voice projects out into audiences loud enough to drown out the fluttering you hear in your stomach any time you have to give a presentation. You still have more growing up to do - you talk with your hands causing your mother's watch to slide up and down your arm, giving away the fact that the band is a little too big for your wrist. After your presentations, the different women you speak to offer a variety of foods to 'fatten' you up: pizza, cupcakes, papaya. After you provide them with information and legal jargon in a Spanish that even impresses your mother, the women feel comfortable enough to share their personal stories about medical bills and hospital miscommunications. One woman pulls you aside, and in a quiet, mumbled slur that comes from having had a stroke, asks if we could help her even though she's undocumented. You smile and say of course, as she searches for a pen to make sure she takes down your phone number. Afterwards, it's past 8:30pm on a Friday night, and you get into the subway train to begin your long journey home. You're exhausted. Bad weather, nerves, and overall having to 'perform' can take a lot out of you, especially when it's not in your nature to be so animated. But you praise yourself sturdy despite the aching joints and bones.  You praise yourself heard, despite the voice that struggles to stay audible. It takes hard work to harvest new ways in which to grow but you praise the glimpses of beauty you see waiting for you on the other side.